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Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Blog Action Day
On October 15, Wednesday, we in Bloggers Kapihan invite Filipino bloggers to participate in Blog Action Day 2008 by taking a stand on poverty.
Poverty is a reality that we cannot deny. We see it everyday. Many live with and in it 24/7. The imperative now is to change this situation. The Blog Action Day 2008 is an opportunity to get poverty out from under the rug where the government has consigned it. We hope that through this renewed focus on poverty, it will be a new start to better understand and not hide it, to offer real solutions not fake ones, to salve the poor people’s wounds and not give them doleouts.If you want to join Blog Action Day 2008, there are a number of things you can do.
1. Blog about poverty on Oct. 15. Share your your ideas on how we as a people should confront it. You may also write about the bright future ahead if we manage to finally solve poverty that, contrary to much-trumpeted statistics, continue to deny millions of our people the benefits of freedom, justice, democracy and prosperity. You may suggest links on poverty and how Filipinos are getting by or, better yet, share powerful and compelling of Filipinos taking action against poverty. Others may post photos and videos on or of our poor people that show their dignity amid their daily struggles to eke out a living. You may also start an online debate on anti-poverty measures amid the financial crisis gripping the world today.
2. Popularize the event by inviting other bloggers to go to this site, post the some buttons and banners on your blog and make sure to link back to this site.
3. Donate money or your personal to concrete actions that empower the poor and marginalized.
No doubt about it, now is the time to think and act on poverty.
If you choose to act, thank you in advance and kindly do the following so we and the world would know Filipinos taking a stand on poverty:
Register and post a comment here if you intend to join.
In your Oct. 15 blog post on poverty, please link to this post.
Thank you!
Grab this button and help us popularize Blog Action Day 2008 on your site:
So there. Here's the link...
http://blogactionday2008.bloggerskapihan.com/?p=1
_________________________________________________________
Poverty is a reality that we cannot deny. We see it everyday. Many live with and in it 24/7. The imperative now is to change this situation. The Blog Action Day 2008 is an opportunity to get poverty out from under the rug where the government has consigned it. We hope that through this renewed focus on poverty, it will be a new start to better understand and not hide it, to offer real solutions not fake ones, to salve the poor people’s wounds and not give them doleouts.If you want to join Blog Action Day 2008, there are a number of things you can do.
1. Blog about poverty on Oct. 15. Share your your ideas on how we as a people should confront it. You may also write about the bright future ahead if we manage to finally solve poverty that, contrary to much-trumpeted statistics, continue to deny millions of our people the benefits of freedom, justice, democracy and prosperity. You may suggest links on poverty and how Filipinos are getting by or, better yet, share powerful and compelling of Filipinos taking action against poverty. Others may post photos and videos on or of our poor people that show their dignity amid their daily struggles to eke out a living. You may also start an online debate on anti-poverty measures amid the financial crisis gripping the world today.
2. Popularize the event by inviting other bloggers to go to this site, post the some buttons and banners on your blog and make sure to link back to this site.
3. Donate money or your personal to concrete actions that empower the poor and marginalized.
No doubt about it, now is the time to think and act on poverty.
If you choose to act, thank you in advance and kindly do the following so we and the world would know Filipinos taking a stand on poverty:
Register and post a comment here if you intend to join.
In your Oct. 15 blog post on poverty, please link to this post.
Thank you!
Grab this button and help us popularize Blog Action Day 2008 on your site:
So there. Here's the link...
http://blogactionday2008.bloggerskapihan.com/?p=1
_________________________________________________________
I hate me.
Shempre naman diba, in the midst of my chaotic life, i can still find time to blog. haha.
I'm sort of okay now. Better. Way way better than last night. After typing my last blog entry, i really felt super weak. And as much as i hated going home in the middle of unfinished acads stuff, i felt too weak to insist that i stay here in my boarding house.
I had my check-up earlier this afternoon. Honestly, i felt sort of disappointed when i foudn out that my illness isn't one of those high-sounding disease I was expecting it to be. Minsan na nga lang ako magkakasakit, pabonggahin naman na natin. haha. Kidding aside, according to my doctor, I have Acute Viral Infection with Gastritis and Low Grade Fever. Yeah, right.
Mommy: Doc, kasi laging hindi kumakain yan. Nagpapalipas ng gutom. Saka nagdidiet din kasi iyan.
Doctor: Naku, masama iyan... (explains how Ulcer develops) Bibigyan kita ng gamot kaso tataba ka dito.
(Joyce looks at mommy with a very worried face)
Joyce: Tataba po ako? Wala na po bang ibang gamot?
hahaha. Imagine the horror in my face when the doctor said i'd gain weight by taking my medication. Haha. Anyway. Myca, Roxy, Longjay and I were having dinner earlier. According to Longjay, kung sa kanya daw ako nagpa-check-up, simple lang ang diagnosis niya sakin, fatigue and stress. You know, right? haha.
So there. 3 hours to go, Wednesday na. Presentation na ng 121 short films namin. And at 5am later, magshooshoot pa kami ng 2 sequences. How perfect can we get, right? weh. at least, may direksyon pa naman kami. We can do this. I know. I so know. ugh.
And lastly, because I'm feeling gaga again, let me just pour my bottle of WHINE here.
To you. As much as i want to say this to you in person, i can't. I hate you. I really really hate you. You make breathing so hard for me. Okay naman eh. Okay naman ako, ang lahat, pag wala ka. I can survive without you. Why do you have to complicate my life? eh. I hate you. Do me a favor. Go and be gone forever. I'll miss you but life will be so much easier that way.
PS. Don't worry, I also hate myself- just in case you find out that it's you i'm talking about here.
I'm sort of okay now. Better. Way way better than last night. After typing my last blog entry, i really felt super weak. And as much as i hated going home in the middle of unfinished acads stuff, i felt too weak to insist that i stay here in my boarding house.
I had my check-up earlier this afternoon. Honestly, i felt sort of disappointed when i foudn out that my illness isn't one of those high-sounding disease I was expecting it to be. Minsan na nga lang ako magkakasakit, pabonggahin naman na natin. haha. Kidding aside, according to my doctor, I have Acute Viral Infection with Gastritis and Low Grade Fever. Yeah, right.
Mommy: Doc, kasi laging hindi kumakain yan. Nagpapalipas ng gutom. Saka nagdidiet din kasi iyan.
Doctor: Naku, masama iyan... (explains how Ulcer develops) Bibigyan kita ng gamot kaso tataba ka dito.
(Joyce looks at mommy with a very worried face)
Joyce: Tataba po ako? Wala na po bang ibang gamot?
hahaha. Imagine the horror in my face when the doctor said i'd gain weight by taking my medication. Haha. Anyway. Myca, Roxy, Longjay and I were having dinner earlier. According to Longjay, kung sa kanya daw ako nagpa-check-up, simple lang ang diagnosis niya sakin, fatigue and stress. You know, right? haha.
So there. 3 hours to go, Wednesday na. Presentation na ng 121 short films namin. And at 5am later, magshooshoot pa kami ng 2 sequences. How perfect can we get, right? weh. at least, may direksyon pa naman kami. We can do this. I know. I so know. ugh.
And lastly, because I'm feeling gaga again, let me just pour my bottle of WHINE here.
To you. As much as i want to say this to you in person, i can't. I hate you. I really really hate you. You make breathing so hard for me. Okay naman eh. Okay naman ako, ang lahat, pag wala ka. I can survive without you. Why do you have to complicate my life? eh. I hate you. Do me a favor. Go and be gone forever. I'll miss you but life will be so much easier that way.
PS. Don't worry, I also hate myself- just in case you find out that it's you i'm talking about here.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Weakling
My body finally gave up.
After weeks of not sleeping, not eating, not taking any rest, blah bla, my body gave up on me. I woke up this morning feeling really nauseous. My stomach was aching so badly. My head was throbbing but the pain was bearable. The urge to puke was really driving me insane.
Mommy and I have a couple of theories why I'm feeling this way. First, I was food poisoned by the food that we ate in the debut party that I attended last night. Second, according to mom, this is ulcer. I wasn't eating properly lately because of stress and diet due to my desperate want to shrink. My present figure is really pulling my confidence down. I'm being very superficial, i know. Anyway, lastly, burnout. I'm abusing myself too much that this morning, it gave up on me.
Right now, i feel very weak. I can feel my head throbbing although the headache is still very tolerable. I can feel my hands shaking. I can feel the weakness of my body. My back aches badly. My arms feel too heavy to function. My legs can't afford to stand. I can't even talk. My energy is so down that merely talking makes me feel so dead tired already. I pant between words. I can still feel my stomach aching although it's also much more tolerable now as compared to how i felt early this morning.
I want to sleep. I want to take a break. I want to breathe fresh air. I want to feel alive again. But i can't. I simply can't.
Today's the 2nd day of our lamayan editing for our BC 121 TV Production class. Of course, hindi lang BC 121 ang class ko. I also have a number of other things i have to attend to.
I am supposed to be in a shoot today. now. We are shooting the remaining 2 sequences of our short film- the final requirement for our TV Prod class. But I chose not to go. I won't be of any help anyway, which adds up to my frustrations for today because of my failure to attend to my duties as the director of this production. Demmit. I am just so lucky to have Dina and Karen as my groupmate. Thanks team.
Anyway, so so so many things are really bugging me right now. I am supposed to be resting but my mind's constantly wandering.
I still have to finish our BC 121 short film. We've only finished one third of it and our deadline's on wednesday already. Which reminds me, we still have to prepare for our mini event on wednesday. We'll be putting the presentation of our short films in public. Everybody's invited to join. And yes, i still haven't accomplished anything for this event.
Demmit. I'm feeling nauseous again. I want to puke. I hate myself. I'm such a weakling.
Anyway. Aside from my BC 121, i still have to complete my incomplete for my MPs 177 class. I'm okay with the SQ already. I just have to patch up and polish everything for the script.
There's also our COM RES 101 paper, which, according to our adviser, is very problematic. I want to die now. We only have one week to go before the submission of our final paper and we're not even halfway through our study.
Then there's our Comm120 class. Media Law. I have three cases to report. INC v CA, Estrada v Desierto, and the Motion for Reconsideration for the Estrada v Desierto case. I'm already familiar with the cases. I just have to muster everything.
My BC 103 is also super messed up. I still have three scripts that I need to submit. I'm almost one month late in submitting these papers. I want to vanish. Right now. weh.
We'll also be having the Final Production for our Radio Performance class this week. Ma'am Pinky's expecting so much from us. I don't want to let her down again.
But things doesn't end in my academic life. I've been missing so much on my responsibilities in Broad Ass. Marketing, Dulaang Kapiterya, Mascapade, Grand Alumni Homecoming, Broad Ass Month. Babawi ako, promise. Goodbye sem break.
And as if physical and mental pain are not yet enough, then enter emotional dilemmas. For the longest time i've been fooling myself to believe what I want to believe. I'm sort of aware that there is already something going on but still, i chose to be really selfish. I chose my own happiness. No. Scrap that. I chose my own pseudo-happiness. I thought i was getting to where I want to be. At least, i thought. Reality's been slapping reality to my face but i still chose to be insensitive. And now, the karma's on me. I just want to cry and run, run really far far away whenever this reality enters my already battered mind.
I promised myself before that i wouldn't fall for somebody who can't love me back. But some things are just out of my control. I don't know. I feel so lost. I don't know if i'm in love. Sometimes i feel like it. Sometimes i choose to not entertain the feeling. I don't know. I feel really lost. Completely lost. I feel shattered. And i don't know anymore how i'm going to pick up the pieces of me that's just so tired of everything.
Somebody told me that in cases like this, what i can just do is to wallow on my shittyness then move on. I know how to wallow. I just don't know how to move on. bitch.
I hate myself. I'm such a weakling.
After weeks of not sleeping, not eating, not taking any rest, blah bla, my body gave up on me. I woke up this morning feeling really nauseous. My stomach was aching so badly. My head was throbbing but the pain was bearable. The urge to puke was really driving me insane.
Mommy and I have a couple of theories why I'm feeling this way. First, I was food poisoned by the food that we ate in the debut party that I attended last night. Second, according to mom, this is ulcer. I wasn't eating properly lately because of stress and diet due to my desperate want to shrink. My present figure is really pulling my confidence down. I'm being very superficial, i know. Anyway, lastly, burnout. I'm abusing myself too much that this morning, it gave up on me.
Right now, i feel very weak. I can feel my head throbbing although the headache is still very tolerable. I can feel my hands shaking. I can feel the weakness of my body. My back aches badly. My arms feel too heavy to function. My legs can't afford to stand. I can't even talk. My energy is so down that merely talking makes me feel so dead tired already. I pant between words. I can still feel my stomach aching although it's also much more tolerable now as compared to how i felt early this morning.
I want to sleep. I want to take a break. I want to breathe fresh air. I want to feel alive again. But i can't. I simply can't.
Today's the 2nd day of our lamayan editing for our BC 121 TV Production class. Of course, hindi lang BC 121 ang class ko. I also have a number of other things i have to attend to.
I am supposed to be in a shoot today. now. We are shooting the remaining 2 sequences of our short film- the final requirement for our TV Prod class. But I chose not to go. I won't be of any help anyway, which adds up to my frustrations for today because of my failure to attend to my duties as the director of this production. Demmit. I am just so lucky to have Dina and Karen as my groupmate. Thanks team.
Anyway, so so so many things are really bugging me right now. I am supposed to be resting but my mind's constantly wandering.
I still have to finish our BC 121 short film. We've only finished one third of it and our deadline's on wednesday already. Which reminds me, we still have to prepare for our mini event on wednesday. We'll be putting the presentation of our short films in public. Everybody's invited to join. And yes, i still haven't accomplished anything for this event.
Demmit. I'm feeling nauseous again. I want to puke. I hate myself. I'm such a weakling.
Anyway. Aside from my BC 121, i still have to complete my incomplete for my MPs 177 class. I'm okay with the SQ already. I just have to patch up and polish everything for the script.
There's also our COM RES 101 paper, which, according to our adviser, is very problematic. I want to die now. We only have one week to go before the submission of our final paper and we're not even halfway through our study.
Then there's our Comm120 class. Media Law. I have three cases to report. INC v CA, Estrada v Desierto, and the Motion for Reconsideration for the Estrada v Desierto case. I'm already familiar with the cases. I just have to muster everything.
My BC 103 is also super messed up. I still have three scripts that I need to submit. I'm almost one month late in submitting these papers. I want to vanish. Right now. weh.
We'll also be having the Final Production for our Radio Performance class this week. Ma'am Pinky's expecting so much from us. I don't want to let her down again.
But things doesn't end in my academic life. I've been missing so much on my responsibilities in Broad Ass. Marketing, Dulaang Kapiterya, Mascapade, Grand Alumni Homecoming, Broad Ass Month. Babawi ako, promise. Goodbye sem break.
And as if physical and mental pain are not yet enough, then enter emotional dilemmas. For the longest time i've been fooling myself to believe what I want to believe. I'm sort of aware that there is already something going on but still, i chose to be really selfish. I chose my own happiness. No. Scrap that. I chose my own pseudo-happiness. I thought i was getting to where I want to be. At least, i thought. Reality's been slapping reality to my face but i still chose to be insensitive. And now, the karma's on me. I just want to cry and run, run really far far away whenever this reality enters my already battered mind.
I promised myself before that i wouldn't fall for somebody who can't love me back. But some things are just out of my control. I don't know. I feel so lost. I don't know if i'm in love. Sometimes i feel like it. Sometimes i choose to not entertain the feeling. I don't know. I feel really lost. Completely lost. I feel shattered. And i don't know anymore how i'm going to pick up the pieces of me that's just so tired of everything.
Somebody told me that in cases like this, what i can just do is to wallow on my shittyness then move on. I know how to wallow. I just don't know how to move on. bitch.
I hate myself. I'm such a weakling.
Friday, October 3, 2008
Jolog Post
Another entry that I found in my drafts. haha.
I edited this entry again. hahaha. had to delete some parts. hahaha. love it.
Dated September 2008
...Pero ewan. Hindi ko alam. Hindi kita maintindihan eh. Naguguluhan talaga ko. Hindi ko talaga alam kung anong paniniwalaan. Ang alam ko lang, kung ano nararamdaman ko. Ang alam ko lang makita pa lang kita... Sabi sayo eh, iba epekto mo sakin. Kung anu-ano na nasasabi ko dito... Pero gaya nga ng sabi ko, ang alam ko lang kung ano ang nararamdaman ko. Iyong nararamdaman mo, wala akong ideya kung ano. Kaya naguguluhan ako...
weh. hinto. tigil. stop. enough. ayun lamang po. iyong kasunod? pag-iisipan ko muna kung ilalagay ko dito.
Actually, thinking about it, it doesn't really matter whether i post the complete message here or not. You don't read blogs. You won't read my blog. And in the first place, you don't even know that it's you i'm talking about here. Gaga kasi ako eh. I know, right? I can go on and on babbling about you without you knowing that i'm actualy babbling about you. Hayhay. BUT! shemps there's still this part of me which thinks and would really love to believe otherwise. Right. the gaga side of me. Oh well.
I edited this entry again. hahaha. had to delete some parts. hahaha. love it.
Dated September 2008
should i or should i not? I'm honestly contemplating big time whether or not i should post this certain blog entry that i wrote out of sheer happiness. haha.
This is the downside of blogging, as they always say: you can't tell EVERYTHING in your blog. As much as i want to go into details of everything, i can't. It'll only make my life crazier. So so so. Compromise. I'll only post a fraction of my uber long blog entry, which until now i haven't finished yet. weeee.
Para jologs, tatagalugin ko na... Itodo na natin ang ka-jologs-ang ito. Magpaka-jologs na tayong lahat...
Para jologs, tatagalugin ko na... Itodo na natin ang ka-jologs-ang ito. Magpaka-jologs na tayong lahat...
...Pero ewan. Hindi ko alam. Hindi kita maintindihan eh. Naguguluhan talaga ko. Hindi ko talaga alam kung anong paniniwalaan. Ang alam ko lang, kung ano nararamdaman ko. Ang alam ko lang makita pa lang kita... Sabi sayo eh, iba epekto mo sakin. Kung anu-ano na nasasabi ko dito... Pero gaya nga ng sabi ko, ang alam ko lang kung ano ang nararamdaman ko. Iyong nararamdaman mo, wala akong ideya kung ano. Kaya naguguluhan ako...
weh. hinto. tigil. stop. enough. ayun lamang po. iyong kasunod? pag-iisipan ko muna kung ilalagay ko dito.
Actually, thinking about it, it doesn't really matter whether i post the complete message here or not. You don't read blogs. You won't read my blog. And in the first place, you don't even know that it's you i'm talking about here. Gaga kasi ako eh. I know, right? I can go on and on babbling about you without you knowing that i'm actualy babbling about you. Hayhay. BUT! shemps there's still this part of me which thinks and would really love to believe otherwise. Right. the gaga side of me. Oh well.
Random Rant
I AM SO FRIGGIN' TIRED. :(